i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
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