was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
