You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
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