i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
