Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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