this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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