i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
