Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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