why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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