i really wish james franco would like my vagina
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
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