If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Randomize
