mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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