I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Randomize
