Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
