You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
