It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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