with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
