...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
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Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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