cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Your cock deserves a montage
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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