as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
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