the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them