scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Randomize
