no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
