Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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