I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
