There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
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