4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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