I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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