Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
