I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Randomize
