I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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