I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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