and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
