its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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