im gay
i know
yea but for you.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Why is your signature on my underwear?
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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