i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize