u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize