so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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