i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
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