found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
