i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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