that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Randomize
