Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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