Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
