i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is wine microwaveable?
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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