oh god the rape fog is back!
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
