fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
My pussy is not your playground.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
