But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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