I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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