My hair reeks of homosexuality.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I just gift wrapped bread.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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