Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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